The Grand Obstructionist Party

Don't expect any tears to be shed for those Republicans who whine because they didn't exact their pound of flesh from the stimulus bill. The GOP ruled the White House for 20 of the past 28 years and the only period of economic prosperity was during a Democratic administration. Republicans had a multitude of opportunities to get it right; they only proved themselves incapable of handling such an awesome responsibility.

There's much rabble from the right about enslaving future generations with billions of dollars to be spent on "pork." Where was this outrage when President Bush and the Republicans took a budget surplus and now seemingly modest $6T debt and turned it into massive deficits and a $10T debt? In fact, the last three Repulican presidents have accrued $7.5T worth of national debt on their watch. 

Impressive, oh party of fiscal responsibility.

SO A WHITE GUY AND A BLACK GUY WALK INTO THE REPUBLICAN NATIONAL COMMITTEE MEETING …

Astoundingly, Republicans can stay true only to their ideals — even while relegating themselves to a regional and irrelevant party. The selection of RNC Chair not long ago highlighted their internal struggle between traditional indignation and institutionalized stupidity; the final vote came down to a racist white Southerner and a black man. It took six rounds of voting to eliminate Katon Dawson, a man who, until September, had a 12-year membership at a Whites Only country club. 

And it's obvious Michael Steele's selection, by a narrow margin of eight percent, was little more than a cynical ploy to get "our Obama." Unfortunately, it's more like a parent embarrassing his kids by trying to use "jive" that's no longer part of the lexicon. 

Immediately after accepting the political equivalent of the clap, Steele briefly acknowledged the new political landscape and vowed to usher in a new era for the party before digressing and beating his chest in the same tired fashion Republicans have been waging war the last decade. 

Steele also stated he doesn't "do cutting-edge. That's what Democrats are doing. We're going beyond cutting-edge." Should someone tell him the only thing beyond the cutting edge is that which is about to get cut?

All of this has Democrats "raising the roof." 

TAKE YOUR STIMULUS AND SHOVE IT WHERE … OH WAIT, CAN I HAVE SOME OF THAT?

House Minority Leader John Boehner (OH) is toeing the same party-line antics as well, willfully ignorant to what that course has done to dismantle the reign of power Newt Gingrich promised would last generations. Boehner reportedly told his caucus to shoot the bill down before President Obama, in a demonstration of his bipartisan approach, went to the Hill to make his case and hear their gripes. Hell hath no fury as an impotent Republican.

Boehner then stood in front of the cameras and, as is the party wont, lied about and mischaracterized provisions in the bill. He made big hay of money for condoms, knowing the subject matter alone would sound sensational. Boehner ignored the actual dollar amount's insignificance, given the heft of the bill overall, while failing to recognize that preventing STDs and unwanted pregnancies would save American tax payers billions. 

He also blasted a high-speed LA-Vegas rail line that isn't even in the bill as "not going to help the construction worker in my district," while apparently oblivious to the two lines expected to be built in his home state.

There's also the much ballyhooed "Pelosi mouse," which, again, has no basis in reality.

Whip Eric Cantor (VA) made the latest assault on the bill — and the intelligence of the electorate. Cantor's ill-advised and poorly constructed video bragging about the zero votes House Republicans gave the bill contained yet another lie, this time claiming ACORN is earmarked for $1B that it, in reality, is not. There is $5.2B slated for community development programs that were signed into law by Republican presidents, funds for which many organizations can apply, but why let facts get in the way of ridiculous lies meant to spur your base?

Of course, the principles guiding Republicans to clamor against the stimulus package do not prevent them from accepting, nay, actively scrambling for the money. At some point, we can expect GOP congressmen across the nation to laude themselves for directing expenditures so deftly as to bring about the revitalization of the American economy. 

Oh wait, it's already happening! Kit Bond (MO), who, of course, voted against the bill and lambasted it as a debt stimulator, is now patting himself on the back for a $2M provision he added to the bill. And he's only one of several House Republicans now glad-handing each other for the fabulous work they did on a bill they voted against.

There are a few possible hold-outs, though. It will be very interesting to see how these rubes do in the polls as they try to explain to their constituents why "principles" are more important than "jobs."

THE PARTY OF BIN LADEN 

The puerile behavior exhibited by Republicans the last few weeks only further cements the belief that they care far more about having power than working for the people they were elected to represent. Party leaders pulled every nasty trick possible to attain and maintain power before and during Bush's presidency, and despite a resounding rebuke by the American electorate in November, they do not demure, yet insist they deserved to write half the stimulus bill. Those whose memories do not run short know that kind of generosity was never given to Democrats the last 8 years.

So now they parade around as children, openly cheering for the bill to fail, which is, in fact, cheering against America. What's more, Pete Sessions (TX) proudly compared his party's tactics to Taliban insurgents. Wow. 

It is to this end President Obama should tear a page from Bush's playbook and insist that Democrats will not negotiate with terrorists.